Split peas indeed.
Very true, and they can be both green and yellow although by far the more common ones are yellow I guess.
You can however make a pea and ham soup with somewhat more conventional peas. I say somewhat, happened to me quite a number of years ago in Scotland.
We'd been pretty much house-bound between Christmas and about the 29th I think, partly because there was no reason to go out and partly because we had a couple of feet of snow and black ice on the roads outside.
I woke on the 30th to find the ham had been eaten down pretty much to the bone so time for the traditional soup, which given the weather seemed a good idea anyway. Go to the cupboard and no lentils to be found - damn!!
I took a look at the very iced over driveway whilst listening to the radio over a coffee, lots of road advisories not to drive unless you had to etc. Well, didn't HAVE to but hate breaking tradition. There was a grocers, not a supermarket, not too far away and it was downhill and it was on a street that would be graveled and salted and if I followed it I'd end up above the house on the hill behind us...
A cunning plan emerged, probably borne of Christmas cheer and being the only one awake in the house of the debauched - bunch of fighter pilots on leave I should possibly explain, thought a solo mission would be fun.
Rugged up, headed out to the garage and found the sled that we'd cobbled together a couple of months back, it was basically a few pieces of surplus airplane pop riveted together but had a good turn of speed and weighed nothing.
Out the door, quick left/right check, no traffic, on sled and down driveway, out onto road and picking up speed on the slope - a little more than seemed prudent but unfortunately fighter pilots lack the prudence gene... It was a T junction at the bottom where I needed to go left for the grocers, had about as much chance of making that, or slowing for it as this chariot had of actually flying - bail out time.
The sled and I parted company, me to do a little ass-slide into a drift, the sled to take roost in a hedge.
Get up, dust off, no problemo, glad for the rugging, go get sled.
A gentler sled run to the grocer, not as steep.
Go in and have a conversation you could really only appreciate if you have spent time in Northern Scotland.
It is fascinating when two people, the very attractive Scots lass behind the counter and this West Country born, London raised boy try to communicate. In theory we both speak English, in practice we could have possibly done better in Esperanto
"Do you have any lentils?"
"Lintels? Yee'd not be finding them here ye sassa-whatever"
"Um, split peas?"
"Dunna knae wot yeer abut laddie - ya want peas or ya need a pee ?"
It went on a while but in the end after exploring a few shelves, and getting her name for later reference, it turned out they had no lentils, cleaned out because everyone had had the same thought, before me.
Well, I'm here now, so what options?
"Peas? canned?"
"Nay, but freez dry... "
"Surprise?"
""Ay laddie"
It is sad but a fact that the invention of convenience food was a real boon to those living in the rather inhospitable parts of the world and Surprise peas are or were a big, big hit around Lossiemouth.
If I recall correctly four packs seemed a good idea for a soup, stuffed into various pockets and now to walk uphill to complete this round trip.
The road was fine, plenty of gravel, and not a soul in sight to see a nutter on a pea run hauling a sled made of purloined military metal up to a new launch point.
To get there had to leave the road and do a trudge through some stunted gorse etc to the ridgeline, but apart from getting wet jeans no issue, then I'm looking down through a few sparse trees in virgin snow at the roof of our off-base home.
Hey!! Nearly done, hop on the sled, head down and go baby !!
Remember that gene ?
I don't THINK there was a sonic boom but geez did that sled go!!!
If it had not been for a mogul I rather think I'd have been a gargoyle on the back wall of the house but instead I was suddenly airborne and deciding it was again time to bail out...
Did a little ass-slide up the backside of the roof, whilst watching the sled parabola into the front yard, snagged the chimney to stop and for a lunatic moment contemplated doing a Saint Nick, but it was past the day and I wasn't wearing red...
Slide back down the roof to the rear yard, easy jump to soft snow - mission accomplished.
A hot shower, change, and let's get this soup happening.
It actually was not much different to a usual pea and ham, just had these shriveled green peas that I ignored the re-hydration directions for, huge pot, all in together and on the stove - oops, forgot that when I went off shopping - wood fired, nearly out - rescue run and roaring again soon.
It really did start to smell pretty damned good, which awoke a couple of the reprobates.
"Hey!! soup, great idea!! Mum always does that!!"
"The hell?" (American exchange visitor.)
"You'll love it man." (New Age RAF pilot. )
"How long?"
"Be a few hours, someone can mash it, I think I did enough.... " (Me)
"Aw man, what did you do - really?"
"Hey We have any bread? Need bread for soup" (Some other reprobate.)
(F%$k - it was there on the shelf...) (Me)
"Hmm, let me tell you how to get to the shop, and back so you can get some bread."
One of the dudes listens, wanders off, comes back with studded snow boots...
"I'll just take a walk."
Hey, my way was MUCH more fun - and I cooked a great soup - my feet don't fit your boots any way - do they ?
It really was a very good soup, from ingredients of expediency and innovation, not to mention degrees of lunacy
When I managed to assemble the saga to tell the guys they made up this trophy for me - "Pea Soup Sled Master."
Last time I saw it it was in a bar in the area, where the lass was working as a barmaid - now how she ended up the custodian, not a story for this forum
Cheers